(1)-"The only thing that really bugs me about televised football coverage is those damn women they have down on the sidelines who don't know what the hell they're talking about.
I mean, I'm not a sexist person, but a woman has no business being down there trying to make some comment about a football game."
--Andy Rooney,"60 Minutes" commentator
(2)-Q: How many men does it take to mop a floor?
A:None. It's a woman's job.
(3)-Q: How are women like paper cups?
A: Both are disposeable.
(4)-Q: Did you hear that they finally made a device that makes cars run 95% quieter?
A: Yeah, it fits right over her mouth.
(5)-Q: Why do women have two sets of lips?
A: So they can piss and moan at the same time.
(6)-Q: Why do women like intelligent men?
A: Opposites attract.
(7)-Feminists are o.k., I just don't want my sister to marry one!
(8)-Q: How do you blind a woman?
A: Put a windshield in front of her face.
(9)-Would you give to the kingdom two houses? Yes. Would yoU give two cars? Yes. Would you give two horses? No. Why not? I have two horses.
--A woman interviwed by a Bishop.
(10)-"There never seems to be any trouble brewing around a bar until a woman puts that high heel over the brass rail. Don't ask, but somehow women at bars seem to create trouble among men.
--Humphrey Bogart
(11)-Q: What do you do if your dishwasher stops working?
A: Slap that woman!!
--Unknown
(12)-Curiousity: An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not the woman is cursed is one of the most active ad insatiable passions of the masculine soul.
--Ambrose Bierce
DONE
Oct 24, 2005 @ 03:41:19
